Apparently just like the seasons, we fall and bloom throughout the year so we shouldn’t expect to shine bright like a diamond each minute of every single day (sorry to trash your lyrics RiRi). This knowledge is something that’s helped me come to an understanding of why self-love holds such great importance when it comes to our mental health and the way we perceive ourselves…
But is it really all about bubble baths and face masks and all those magical and mystical potions your favourite influencer posts on social media or does it come from a deep place within ourselves? A place that’s tender and needs to be nurtured; a state of mind? I had a scroll through the #selflove hashtag on Instagram to see what kind of content came up, and I stumbled upon a few trends.
What stood out to me the most was that majority of the posts were by women, unsurprising of course to this big feminist over here who totally believes that men should and need to be just as open about their insecurities as us girls. However, I also believe it’s because society conditions women to look, behave and live a particular way simply because there’s a vagina between our legs. So it makes sense that we drive ourselves nuts with thoughts about changing the tiniest of things about our bodies and personalities to fit into this womanly mould that’s been cut out for us.
Something else I noticed was that a lot of the posts were photos of body transformations, gym selfies and health foods; all that good stuff. So is self-love predominantly about how content we are with out bodies? Don’t get me wrong I love a good work out and yummy green food but is a buddha bowl really going to make me love myself the way that I should and if so how many do I need to consume over the next week please?
For real though, I think it’s a compilation of all the little, tiny things that make you feel wholesome and getting into a habit of doing them without thinking, simultaneously – it’s so simple that it just becomes part of your life and daily routine.
Little bit more positivity over here…I found that all the #selflove posts were very much revolved around the individual (duhhh) BUT let me explain. A lot of the time we can confuse self-love with the love and attention we receive from others. For example, if a guy or girl that you’re into is constantly validating you, obviously you’re going to feel amazing for it, but don’t rely on it as the predominant source of validation – you’re a rock star even if they don’t like your bomb ass selfie. Be mindful of that.
So whether it’s because the season is rapidly changing and I can feel -30 creeping up every day like a big ice monster that’s coming to break me down or just because I’m pmsing like mad right now, self-love is definitely something I’m struggling with. Which is really not like me and I’m ready to fight this feeling off, like a girl. 💪🏼🖕🏼
Brb while I listen to ‘thank u, next’ on repeat for the rest of winter.